Wednesday, December 31, 2008

you are the change, am the odd man out...

you have been what are

you are what you are

you will be what you are to be


i probably have not been what you wanted me to be

i probably am not what want me to be

i shall not be what you want me to be


you and i making a ‘we’ is a wonder

you changed

and change is the only permanent thing…


i have been the odd man out,

i have been trying to cope with you

i walked fast to catch you

i ran till i went breathless

i didn’t catch you

i couldn’t catch you

i am the odd man out.

i didn’t understand the changes

they were as obvious as the weather changes

(well currently the weather is not very consistent either)

you always been in the pattern

i always tried to pop-up or drop-down

my eagerness to see you, to be with you seems unreal to you?

it makes me feel so lonely, you would have no idea.

well

what the hake

anyway

whatever

this is all rubbish

as temporary as my anguish

forget it…

you change,

i will be what i know to be…

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Our strength grows out of our weaknesses




a song

amiss
an emotion
a demand
a feeling
an experience
a thought
a relation
a sense
void



you and i
we have been such

my urge to love is such
our distance is such.
there is something strong in
incompleteness,
future
possibilities
options

i have read somewhere,
'we can choose our past and future'

what do i do?

do i tell you,
what i feel for you?
do i wait,
and see if really i do?
do i love you?

i have passed the phase
(at least so would i like to believe)
to ask questions like,
'what is love'?
(i think these are pseudo questions,
with rather dynamic answers,
hence should not hold us at those)


the urge of openness
and the demand of intimacy
the need of company
and ego of being incomplete
complex and simple
conflicts and smoothness

where am i heading?
where are we heading?
do you have any idea?
i don't know...
i really don't know...

the evening is such...

Sunday, December 07, 2008

theory of relativity...

an action is a reaction to an action
an action has an equal and opposite reaction


an egg first?
or a hen first?

i feel affectionate towards you
you feel distant from me
i feel attached to you
you find me unfair
i accept my mistakes
you are proven to be right

i really don't understand
how can i be right?
how stupid?

if i will be right,
you will be wrong

and that's never the case
that can never be the case

i act
you react
i continue to act
you continue to react

now i think,
i understand
why we are such...

an action is a reaction to an action
an action has an equal and opposite reaction

Monday, December 01, 2008

progressively stable...

My attachments
Your detachments
are synonyms.

The language has been the problem
in communication between us
for a longer while now
we need a fresher reason
a brand new excuse
to not understand
each other.

our language consists of similar sounds
but may not be, the same words
and rarely the same emotion.

You are a perfectionist
You commit no mistakes
and i never stop making mistakes
i repeat my ‘mis-take’-s
time and again
i can’t not do what I do...

at times i wonder
why this?
i come with the blood of Sisyphus
do i seem to be in a trap of repetition?
A trap?
i have heard,
everything repeats.
creation - sustenance – destruction
Happens time and again.

A tree is eternal
Life is eternal
Life is about sustenance
sustenance is a base for Life
sustenance is a need of Life

i am such
Life is such

i do myself
time and again
i be myself…